Archive for the ‘Humor’ Category

Marc Andreessen and the Bionic Woman TV show

Tuesday, April 1st, 2008

Marc Andreessen loves the Bionic Woman TV show. LOL. As the show progressed he blogged questions about the show that obviously revealed his dissatisfaction towards it; many of these questions were just too funny:

(disclaimer: I watched the show only once)

With my favorite of all the questions:

“We have to recover the flash drive!” Clue to all future Hollywood writers: flash drives can be copied in about 90 seconds. Once it’s out of your view for 90 seconds, getting it back does you practically no good, since any bad guy with an IQ higher than his shoe size would have copied it, and then probably copied the copy. Chasing it around for days and days makes no sense at all. Where do these shows get their technical consultants — and are they from planet Earth?

…and

Any organization that developed biomedical technology for instant healing and flawless body part replacement — technology 20 years ahead of its time — would be able to license it and generate hundreds of billions of dollars of income very quickly. Instead, they keep it secret and derive no real value from it. Why?

(On behalf of my childhood, I would also like to extend this same question to the producers of Knight Rider and Airwolf.)

:-)

ceo

Communications-Related Major Archeological Findings, On All Three Coasts

Sunday, March 2nd, 2008

From Cajun News Network:

After having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year, New York scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 100 years and came to the conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 100 years ago.

Not to be outdone by the New Yorkers, in the weeks that followed, California scientists dug to a depth of 20 feet, and shortly after, headlines in the LA Times newspaper read: ‘California archaeologists have found traces of 200 year old copper wire and have concluded that their ancestors already had an advanced high-tech communications network a hundred years earlier than the New Yorkers.’

One week later, ‘The Thibodeaux Gazette’, a local newspaper in Thibodeaux, LA, reported the following: ‘After digging as deep as 30 feet in rice fields near Houma, Boudreaux, a self-taught archaeologist, reported that he found absolutely nothing. Boudreaux has therefore concluded that 300 years ago, Louisiana had already gone wireless.’

ceo

[Via my good (Cajun) friend from LSU, Scot D'Arbonne]

The Effects of Alcohol in Programming

Thursday, December 20th, 2007

xkcd - ballmer peak
(The Ballmer Peak)

Click to enlarge (xkcd)

Coolest Gadget for Father's Day — Baby monitor that turns into a Space Station monitor

Sunday, June 17th, 2007





Click to see video (Fox Chicago)


“I put the kids down, put the baby monitor on and saw two people floating in space.”

Happy Father's Day!

ceo

[Via The Raw Feed,
Wired Maganize,
and Fox Chicago]

The new Microsoft Surface, with advanced kernel debugging

Thursday, May 31st, 2007

Got the Blue Screen of Death (BSOD) while using the new Microsoft Surface? No Worries… The new Microsoft Surface comes with a new interactive, multi-touch-screen kernel-level debugging support!




…and it is so good, that even users play with and smile at it.

ceo


[Thanks to my buddy Elias Saucedo for creating the Surface BSOD image for me]

Multiple choice tests: "B is the new C"

Saturday, May 12th, 2007

The Answer is NOT always C



ceo

My US$15 Million has been approved

Sunday, February 25th, 2007

I've just received an email from Dr. Edward Joseph (joseph_1000e@yahoo.co.uk), from the UK telling me:


“This is to inform you that your funds of US$15 Million has been approved for immediate delivery to you”

Awesome…

All I have to do is give them my full names, my direct telephone numbers, physical address with zip code, and my passport and drivers license numbers… Hell, I also will supply them my social security number, why not!


“So that there will be no error during the delivery of the funds to you in your country of residence, your quick response will be highly appreciated.”

Thanks Dr. Joseph! that is just was I needed to bootstrap!

ceo

iPhone Cartoon – She has fallen and can't get up

Monday, January 29th, 2007

Funny cartoon…



Click to mad4mobilephones.com

ceo

[Via Erik's Linkblog]

Funny stuff from The Daily WTF

Friday, January 19th, 2007

What is Google trying to say?


And this one, see the SQL statement printed on the package content's print:



ceo

Binary Sudoku

Saturday, January 13th, 2007


Binary Sudoku – this is funny:

.

[via David Beer's blog]

ceo

Learning the C Programming Language at an early age

Monday, December 11th, 2006


ceo

[Via Emerson Santos' weblog]

Signs of Bubble 2.0?

Tuesday, December 5th, 2006



Remember, “no business model” == “burst into flames”… unless, acquired for large user-base and/or technology – but only few fall in that category, meaning the odds are high…

ceo

A day with a non-technical dev manager

Sunday, October 22nd, 2006

There is a development team…


and there is the team's development manager.

And the team works on their S/W product,


and the manager manages the team.

A bug is found,


a synchronization problem it is,


threads are deadlocking,


a synchronization bug by a developer.

The manager is not too happy,


the developers explain the isolated problem,


the manager says, “I understand”,


the developers take a deep breath and exhale,


and the manager says…


“but from now on, no synchronization at all is to be used!”.

The end…

:-)

The characters in this story are fictitious, and no one was harm during the production of this story…
But, could this be (or is this) a real story?

The (Relative) Truth behind Zinedine Zidane (Zizou) Head-butt World Cup Incident

Friday, July 14th, 2006

OMG! A friend sent me these in an email… but there was no attribution. I don't know who created these sequences, but whoever did, thank you! This is so funny! If you know who created these, please leave a comment with the information, so that I can give proper attribution… Depending on how much downloads/bandwidth these will consume (which cost me money), I may decide to disable the page in the future – please don't Digg…

See – The (Relative) Truth behind Zinedine Zidane (Zizou) Head-butt World Cup Incident

DISCLAIMER – HANDSET AND HANDSET USAGE WARNING

Sunday, May 7th, 2006

Due to recent circumstances, we have been forced to write the following disclaimer…

DISCLAIMER – HANDSET AND HANDSET USAGE WARNING -

Handsets and its software can be unpredictable and unsafe. Handsets can be dangerous. It has been reported all around the Internet about these dangers, and there's no way we can list them all here. Read the news.

Handsets and its software may have hidden design holes – these can create frustrations, get you distracted, you can loose your data, time and money. We do not inspect, supervise or maintain handsets or all its software.

The network can go down, batteries can drain, data can be unintentionally deleted by the user, the wrong key input can be entered when cycling through the hard to use T9 keyboard, the keyboard design can be unnatural, batteries can explode, the OK or CANCEL button can be reverse, all resulting in data loss, frustrations, or personal injury.

Real dangers are present from daily handset use – you can get a brain tumor. Using hands-off devices with Bluetooth is no guarantee and can increase the risk of tumor by having 2.6 2.4 GHz wireless frequency right onto your brain.

Weather can be dangerous, regardless of the forecast. When using your handset, be prepared with rain gear. Electrocution, short circuit, loss of network connectivity, loss of power, can all result in data loss, and frustration. This frustration may get you disoriented and lost. Carry food, water and first aid supplies at all times. Rain can turn a typical day into a deathtrap.

Handsets can be used to track your whereabouts with or without your knowledge or permission – beware, your spouse, significant other, employer, or stalker can be tracking you right now.

You can go broke if using data-plans and/or messaging (SMS, MMS, IM) – this is especially true if you have teenagers.

Handset use can create distractions – you can get into a car accident, fall, be injured or die. Or you can run over a pedestrian.

Handsets can fall from the sky – beware. This can happen naturally by accident, or be caused by people in higher grounds when throwing their handsets out the window, frustrated with their handsets. Use of helmets is advised for anyone approaching business areas with high buildings, as the force of handsets falling increases with altitude – this can kill you. Helmets won't necessarily save you if you get hit by something big, but nevertheless you should use a helmet in such situations. Please note that handsets can be of all sizes – massive first generation handsets, or smaller new generation. Don't think it can't happen.

We take no responsibility. The other handset users, including other visitors, our employees, agents, and guests, and anyone else who might sneak in, may be stupid, reckless, or otherwise dangerous. They may be mentally ill, criminally insane, drunk, using illegal drugs and/or armed with deadly weapons (such as the handset itself) and ready to use them (i.e. throw the handset). We aren't necessarily going to do anything about it.

If you use your handset, you may die or be seriously injured. This is true whether you are experienced or not, trained or not, equipped or not, though training and equipment may help. It's a fact, using your handset is extremely dangerous. If you don't like it, don’t use handsets. You really shouldn't be doing it anyway. There is no substitute to a warm face-to-face conversation. We do not provide supervision or instruction. We are not responsible for, and do not inspect or maintain, handsets or the software in it (including batteries, antennas, browser, Java, BREW or Windows Mobile implementations, Mobile Media API, Graphics API, etc.) As far as we know, any of them can and will fail and may send you plunging into frustration, and possibly your death. There are countless tons of loose handsets ready to be dislodged by frustrated users and fall on you or someone else. There are many extremely and unusually dangerous conditions existing on and around handsets. We may or may not know about any specific hazard, but even if we do, don't expect us to try to warn you. You're on your own.

We don’t provide rescue services. Local rescue squads may not be equipped for or trained in handset injury rescue. If you are lucky enough to have somebody try to rescue you or treat your injuries, they may be incompetent or worse. This includes doctors and hospitals. We assume no responsibility. Also, if you decide to participate in a handset rescue operation of some other unfortunate, that's your choice. Don't do it unless you are willing to assume all risks.

By using your handset you are agreeing that we owe you no duty of care or any other duty. We promise you nothing. We do not and will not even try to keep handsets safe for any purpose. Handsets are not safe for any purpose. This is no joke. We won't even try to warn you about any dangerous or hazardous condition, whether we know about it or not. If we do decide to warn you about something, that doesn't mean we will try to warn you about anything else. If we do make an effort to fix a specific unsafe handset condition, we may not try to correct any others, and we may make matters worse! We and our employees or agents may do things that are unwise and dangerous. Sorry, we're not responsible. We may give you bad advice. Don't listen to us. In short, USE YOUR HANDSET AT YOUR OWN RISK.

Even if you know what you're doing, lots of things can go wrong and you may be injured or die. It happens all the time.

Handsets and/or related software may be negligently constructed or repaired. They are unsafe, period. Live with it or stay away.

The Management

[These guidelines are an adaptation from Nelsons Rock Disclaimer]